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DONNA THORNTON Donna is probably the most significant person in my life outside
of my immediate family. I remember the first time I met her at a small
mid-week church group - she had her red glossy hair in a bob to the chin and
I remember her smiling face! She was 18 – I was 13. She walked into the room
with such a warm and confident presence –and a laughter that rose frequently
and easily – I immediately loved her! At that time she had just become a
Christian, whereas I had been one for as long as I could remember – but that
night, and the following weeks, I grew excited about this weekly meeting as
this girls enthusiasm became infectious in my life. I knew God personally,
yes, but this was someone who was totally unashamed about God’s place in her
life, and that made me more confident at school, and more excited about the
possibilities of this God we both shared. Donna was the one person who taught
me about a God of grace who I didn’t need to hide parts of my life from – but
rather someone I could take every aspect of my life to – a God that loved me
no matter how messy life became. I found this God hard to grasp and accept -
but whenever I was with Donna and saw how she treated me, and my family,
without judgement or expectation – I could begin to see a God who could love
me unconditionally too. I don’t remember quite how our friendship developed
from this point onwards – only that Donna soon became my hero and closest
friend. The honest truth is that nobody has quite impacted my life like she
did - I thought she was amazing. I watched how she talked to people, how
easily she gained the friendship and trust of many, and I wanted to be just like
her. I saw how kind she was to people of ALL ages and backgrounds, whether it
be a prostitute or a dying patient, she wanted the best for all those who she
considered friend. She was fiercely protective of those she loved – and it
made me all the more passionate about my family and my friends. She was SO
insightful - just SO perceptive, and I know that my own opinions and
perceptions have developed through the many insights she has offered to me. I
saw Donna all the time, she made herself available to me whenever I wanted –
she never said no - I sat with her during every church meeting, and
afterwards for many Sunday lunches around my family table. I spoke to her
most days on the telephone. She invited me round to her flat regularly for
girly nights, or she would invite herself round to my house! - And I would
cuddle up with her under that patchwork quilt she had and watch the video she
had bought and eat and drink the food she had provided. Donna taught me many
little things too – she taught me that there is no shame in walking to
Jackson’s corner supermarket in pyjamas - and even with bare feet on occasion
– should the urgency of Pringles, chocolate and wine require it. That making
Coffee is a serious matter - Always put the milk in before the hot water to
ensure coffee beans are not burned! When it came to friendships Donna taught
me that there is no crisis that could not be greatly diffused with a gentle
voice and stroke of the arm! To write a card for someone, even if it is for
no particular reason, could mean so much – or even just a phone-call. Little
gifts cost little but time – but could mean more than anything to the person
it is intended for. I remember so many times when she would bring me flowers,
or chocolate, or give me a card for my bedroom wall. She was like that
towards everyone. Many a time she nursed my wounds as I cried over all the
things teenagers do. She never made me feel stupid, however silly the trauma
– she never put me down or showed the impatience she must have felt at times
– in fact, throughout my A-levels, she would phone me every day for endless
hours of talking, continuing to do so even when she moved down south. I never
kept anything from her and she was the first person I turned to. She was also
very generous – I remember being so surprised when, one December, she gave me
£100 to spend on myself because she knew I was using all of the wages from my
first Saturday job to pay for Christmas presents – our little secret. She
insisted on paying for my train ticket every single time I visited her in
London to this very day – even 3 weeks ago. She never made a fuss and gave so
much of her time, her money and her love to just this one girl. She never
tired of my stories, my family, my problems, or my company. Throughout the
years I have known Donna, she spoke her mind with spirit and challenged
everything she wanted to along the way. She was not afraid to be honest. But
when it came to my life, she spoke so gently, never fierce, never
judgemental, almost unnoticed, she would influence me for the better. Donna
accepted me for who I am but always believed in my full potential. She never
rejected me, even when she hasn’t agreed with some of the choices I have made
– even when I have let her down. Her opinion meant a lot to me but her love
means even more. Thank-you Donna. I
can see so many examples of how my own experiences and ambitions have been
shaped by the amazing role model you have been. I love you so much and missed
you from the moment I heard and knew that I could no longer pick up the phone
to hear your voice, and no more see your beautiful face. Thank-you Jesus for
putting Donna in my life. |
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Charlotte Littlewood |